27 responses to Do Amish remarry?
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    Mary Manna
    Comment on Do Amish Remarry? (January 4th, 2012 at 07:52)

    Do Amish Remarry?

    Erik, question:

    Since Amish men do not grow beards until they marry, can they shave, or do they shave their beards when they become widowers? Would a shaven face, if that does occur, be a sign of availability once again to marry? Or once a beard, always a beard, even if the wife dies?

    Thanks, Erik.



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      Comment on Do Amish remarry? (January 4th, 2012 at 10:25)

      Hi Mary, I’m not aware that ever happens. Widowers I’ve met keep the beards. And Amish in different communities actually have different times when they grow beards, not always upon marriage.

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        Mary Manna
        Comment on Do Amish remarry? (January 4th, 2012 at 10:28)

        Thanks, Erik! Interesting! Hadn’t heard that one before … Different times when they grow beards!


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          Comment on Growing a beard at different times (January 4th, 2012 at 10:34)

          Growing a beard at different times

          Yes in some communities it is on reaching a certain age (ie in the case of single men), or following baptism, and so on.

          Most cases it is pegged to around the time of marriage but there are some variations.

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        Comment on Beards (January 4th, 2012 at 19:52)


        I have read that single Amish men will grow beards at forty years of age. But as Erik states, that may vary.

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    Sherry Gore
    Comment on Do Amish remarry? (January 4th, 2012 at 10:42)

    Good job. Great informative article, Erik.

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      Comment on Do Amish remarry? (January 4th, 2012 at 10:50)

      Thanks Sherry. Hope the new publication is going well! You’ll have to “visit” and share with us soon 🙂

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      Comment on Marriage (March 31st, 2012 at 00:06)


      Sherry- Are you windowed? I know that you have children. How is your daughter?

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    Comment on A Remarriage (January 4th, 2012 at 11:59)

    A Remarriage

    Hi Erik — More than 20 years ago our friend Joe was remarried to a sweet woman named Fanny after his first wife died from cancer. He had several children going into his his second marriage, and he and Fanny had several more. She raised them as her own. Their children are all grown now, and all but two of the boys are married off. Fanny has been a true blessing to Joe. He had a stroke a couple years ago that has left him somewhat incapacitated; one of his sons took over for him in his workshop where he made rustic birdhouses and lawn ornaments. Your readers who have placed orders with us have received stamped card-stock bookmarks with a simple kapp ribbon and the names of crafters whose products they purchased. These are Joe’s handiwork.

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    Alice Mary
    Comment on Labor of Love! (January 4th, 2012 at 13:14)

    Labor of Love!

    Keith, thank you for sharing that sweet story. Fanny sounds like a saint of a woman!

    From what I’ve read about the Amish, I think it would be, oh, how can I put this…”unnatural” for them NOT to remarry. Their communities are so closely knit, I would think that the widow or widower would want to share “togetherness” (companionship, if not “family formation”) with another spouse, one caring for the other.

    Their “selflessness” (putting their spouse’s needs before their own) is something I think young people should really take to heart before considering marriage. In our “Me” society, that would seem to be a major challenge/obstacle to marriage for many, young and old, in the “English” world!

    Alice Mary

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    Lee Ann
    Comment on Do Amish remarry? (January 4th, 2012 at 13:40)

    Alice Mary:

    Your correct that many young people today, only think of themselves. My husband has had 3 strokes in the past 2 months. Its not easy caring for someone who has had a stroke and needs help. Lucky mine can still talk, but he is getting weaker everyday.

    We are told to put others before ourselves. Giving service to our family and others in the community is what life is all about.

    I do understand the Amish way to remarry and have a companion there to share life with and have someone there to help care for you. Many in the english world prefer to stay alone after one’s spouse dies or a divorce.

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    Comment on I applaud the Amish (January 4th, 2012 at 14:44)

    I applaud the Amish

    Alice Mary and Lee Ann sure hit the nail on the head regarding the worldly current ‘Me First’ society, and the contrasting values demonstrated by couples in Amish marriages. I applaud the Amish for retaining that selfless treasure of mates serving one another so faithfully – it is what God first ordained. (from a Christian ‘Englisher’)

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    Mona (Kentucky Lady).
    Comment on Do Amish remarry? (January 4th, 2012 at 17:16)

    Thanks Erik for answering my questions 🙂 Mona

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    Alice Mary
    Comment on Bless you! (January 4th, 2012 at 20:11)

    Bless you!

    Lee Ann, I’m so sorry to hear about your husband’s strokes! Please know that he is in my prayers (as are you) as you both continue your own “story” as husband and wife. I can only imagine how difficult your task is. He picked a good woman as a spouse, I’d say.

    I’m sure he’d take good care of you, if the situation was reversed. Bless you both!

    Alice Mary

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      Lee Ann
      Comment on Do Amish remarry? (January 9th, 2012 at 16:33)

      Thanks so much Alice Mary. Appreciate your kindness.
      You can keep in touch with me via email if you like. I could give you my email address if you give me yours.

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    Comment on Write a post on beards, please! (January 4th, 2012 at 21:21)

    Write a post on beards, please!

    I think a detailed, and separate, entry on beards would be useful, to explain the various reasons why and when Amish men wear them.
    Excellent entry on remarriage though!

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      Comment on Amish beard practices (January 5th, 2012 at 08:09)

      Amish beard practices

      Shom, thanks, and in lieu of a post, for the time being I’m going to nudge anyone who’s interested towards Stephen Scott’s book “Why Do They Dress That Way?” which contains a quite detailed description of beard practices in different communities in chart form.

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    Comment on Do Amish remarry? (January 5th, 2012 at 08:50)

    Thanks for your post, Erik. 🙂 I would also like to know a little more on how the older people do courtships and marriage, since they no longer go to singings. How would a man let an unmarried woman know he is interested in her and what would that courtship be like? How long do those courtships usually last in comparison to the younger couples’?

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    Mona (Kentucky Lady).
    Comment on Do Amish remarry? (January 5th, 2012 at 12:47)

    Me too Jessica 🙂 Erik will let us know I’m sure….perhaps you can write a book on all of our questions Erik !!Another project for you in case you get bored in Poland 🙂
    So what are you doing these days ? Does your girlfriend live in Poland ??? Just wondering 🙂

    I think we need to get you married Erik LOL…..you need some kiddies…..they are so much fun and they will keep you plenty busy…ask any of us mothers we can tell you……I only had 2 and I love them dearly, and wouldn’t take a million dollars for them, and wouldn’t give you a penny for 2 more just like them LOL…heard this somewhere and thought it was cute…..just sayin…….

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    Comment on Do Amish remarry? (January 5th, 2012 at 21:06)

    Very interesting post, Erik…What would we do without your helpful answers!

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    Lee Ann
    Comment on Do Amish remarry? (January 9th, 2012 at 16:35)

    Erik, thanks so much for the idea of another book to learn more about the Amish and their ways.

    Funny on Mona’s comment to get you married. Im sure there are lots of women you can date and marry in Poland. Yes, children are a joy to have.

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    tiffany rangier
    Comment on 2nd chance (January 11th, 2012 at 21:43)

    2nd chance

    when someone gets a divorce it is bad,bad things cause divorce.I aint sure about remarriage.god knows the reason for divorce of each situation…I am not trying to step on toes here,I know I am a women.women who divorce and remarry will live with a stigmitism.

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    Comment on Remarriage (November 22nd, 2015 at 23:48)


    I don’t really get the Amish stance Jesus set free the woman at the well. I am divorced because my ex divorced me she cheated committed adultery And left me for another man. I was very new Christian and did not know.what it meant to hear from God.I basically found out that I was conned into the marriage even by her parents. And now my girlfriend is from the Mennonite and Amish community she fears her family will not approve. Jesus died so we would not have to face punishment. Do you really think I should be punished for the rest of my life because my wife left me? because she was not a true believer and she comitted adultry?

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    Don Curtis
    Comment on Amish and remarriage (November 24th, 2015 at 15:52)

    Amish and remarriage

    I asked my son, Mark, who is Amish. He said that Amish may and often do remarry after a spouse dies. The retired senior bishop in his district has been married three times being widowed twice. Another older bishop has been married twice losing his first wife to cancer. However, divorce and remarriage is forbidden. To answer you Remarriage, according to Mark, it doesn’t really matter what we think or don’t think about divorce and remarriage. It is what the Bible and specifically, Jesus said on the subject. The Lord Jesus says that to remarry after divorce is the same as adultery. Don’t disagree with the Amish, take it up with the Lord.

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    Don Curtis
    Comment on Marriage and beards (November 24th, 2015 at 15:56)

    Marriage and beards

    Mark told me that in his community a boy or man is expected to grow a beard as soon as he is able. Most of the unmarried boys kind of have stubbles. Mark has a full beard because he feels at his age he should. Mark is 63. By the way, today is my birthday and I turned 93. Mark said that in some very traditional Amish communities men may not grow a beard until they are married. Mark saw this in the Lancaster County, PA area and in other communities as well.

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    Comment on Happy Birthday! WOW! (November 27th, 2015 at 01:14)

    Happy Birthday! WOW!

    Wow! Don, 93 years old today! That is totally awesome! You have seen a lot – heard a lot – lived a lot! You are amazing and super special that God blessed you with that many years, and more to come. I know a lady at church who’s 94 and she still dances – can you believe that? What’s your secret?


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