12 responses to How Amish Defuse Conflict By Moving
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    Tom Geist
    Comment on Should I stay or should I go.... (February 23rd, 2015 at 12:06)

    Should I stay or should I go....

    The article says that moving is one way to avoid conflicts. Before the people actually leave one would assume that the subject of why they are moving must come up. So, how do they handle the question of moving?

    I know of one Amish family told me they were looking to move but didn’t want me to tell anyone else. Turns out the place they went to check out land had a Amish Newspaper scribe that listed they came to the area to look for land, so the cat was out of the bag. OOPS!

    Tom Geist

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    Al in Ky
    Comment on How Amish Defuse Conflict By Moving (February 23rd, 2015 at 12:41)

    This post was interesting. There are several Amish communities I am pretty familiar with, and several times have learned of people from a specific community moving. As I try to do with all of my conversations with Amish friends, I don’t ask too many questions, but always wonder the reason for a family moving who has been in the community for quite some time. I’m pretty sure quite often it’s to avoid conflicts. With members of other Christian Churches,
    such as Baptist, Lutheran, and even Mennonite, if a member has a conflict with other members or doesn’t agree with some change in church life, and there is another church of that denomination in that community, often the member or family will just join another like-minded church. Yet, I don’t think the Amish have that choice.
    Or do they? Can an Amish church member join a church in another nearby district of the same affiliation to avoid a conflict in their present district? I’d be interested to hear what Mark of Holmes Co. has observed regarding this.

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      Mark – Holmes Co.
      Comment on How Amish Defuse Conflict By Moving (February 24th, 2015 at 10:55)

      Since the church district is set by boundaries (often roads) it is not an option to change to another district without moving there. So you can’t decide to switch districts but stay in the same home. Sometimes people do move to another location to be in a different district, but I’d say in this community moving like that is more apt to be for less crowded conditions or more conservatism. Forrest was right — a lot of effort is made to resolve issues. Moving is a last resort, in my opinion. Often if a person can’t get along in one district because of personality conflicts, he’ll find the same challenges is his new location.

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    Forest in North Carolina
    Comment on How Amish Defuse Conflict By Moving (February 23rd, 2015 at 15:01)

    “Can an Amish church member join a church in another nearby district of the same affiliation to avoid a conflict in their present district?”

    Probably depends on the specific conflict; if it is a conflict over church doctrine, joining another church of the same affiliation in an adjoining district is probably not an option, since the same conflict will be there at the new church. Transportation to the new church, that is, length of distance you have to travel, also would be an issue, in some cases.
    If it is some kind of personality conflict between brothers in the church, moving might be an option, although I believe the church would make every effort to resolve the issue within itself, among the brotherhood. Again, if you can’t get along with your brothers in one district, you may have the same problems elsewhere.
    Just my thoughts from a conservative Mennonite perspective… Mark can probably elaborate on it far better than I.

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      Al in Ky
      Comment on How Amish Defuse Conflict By Moving (February 25th, 2015 at 07:03)

      Thanks to Mark and Forest for helpful information to further understand Amish and moving.

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    Alice Mary
    Comment on Lonlieness vs. conflict? (February 23rd, 2015 at 21:37)

    Lonlieness vs. conflict?

    Come to think of it, the English sort of do the same thing. I know of a contentious “father/grandfather” who didn’t get along with most of his kids, so he moved to another state…then tried to get the one kid he DID get along with to move there as well. It didn’t work, and now he’s alone (and lonely) a couple of states away.

    Do most of the Amish who do this find a “welcoming” district? Do they have an idea of where they’re going before they pull up stakes?

    Alice Mary

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      Comment on How Amish Defuse Conflict By Moving (February 24th, 2015 at 10:06)

      I would think most have some firsthand idea, because there’s a good chance they’d visit beforehand to at the least investigate a land purchase or arrange some other living place.

      Family can be a conduit for this as well, you might have a son or daughter or other family member in a different community which would be a possibly compelling reason to consider it if you were thinking about a move.

      They would also need to have a sense of the Ordnung of the church they would be joining, and might stay within the same affiliation or seek a higher or lower church accordingly.

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    Jeff Baker
    Comment on Non Amish can be non-conflicting too (February 24th, 2015 at 06:12)

    Non Amish can be non-conflicting too

    I do the same with my own decisions – non-conflict and don’t burn your bridges if possible. If you do not share the same ideals/morals/lifestyle with those you live next to or near, you peacefully move. The same goes for your own children and blood relatives – once you are eighteen or so years old, you can stay around them or move on and associate with people that resonate with you.

    I teach my children that you can not and should not try to change other people. You can only change yourself.

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    Comment on How Amish Defuse Conflict (February 24th, 2015 at 07:46)

    How Amish Defuse Conflict

    We have a farm in Yoder township that had been owned by an Amish relative who moved to Marysville to avoid conflict and to live with a more strict group. But I have a cousin who just moved back to Yoder from Marysville (missing family) and it’s great to have them back. There’s three districts in the Yoder area and sometimes people “visit” other districts a lot to ease tension. One in particular is known to be more strict. But it wasn’t strict enough to cause a few to move to Marysville.

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    Comment on I had no idea (February 25th, 2015 at 09:56)

    I had no idea

    This was a very interesting post, thank you! I don’t know why (and it seems dumb to say now with how much I now know), but I didn’t think Amish people moved often. I starting thinking about why they’d move a few years ago when I got Amish neighbors right next door. I don’t know much about them, but I believe my husband said they moved from WI to southern IA and then finally next door. I always wondered why! We live in central MN. On the edge of the Becker County settlement. Which I believe is growing quite quickly, that, or I’m just now more aware of the Amish around me?

    Sadly, we don’t talk much. I’d love to be their friend though! I fear that when they came over soon after moving in around 6am to use our phone to call the owner (they hadn’t closed on the house yet) and my husband asked them to not make a habit of it so early, that closed the door on friendship. However, we do exchange baked goods, waves and they helped us a bit with our first garden by bringing some manure!

    I’m not sure what affiliation is in Becker County, can anyone shed some light?

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      Comment on Amish in Becker County, MN (February 25th, 2015 at 19:12)

      Amish in Becker County, MN

      Hope you’ll be able to build a friendship there Jess. I don’t know if I’d blame your husband for being not so enthusiastic at 6 am. That’s early for a lot of us, but for instance a dairy farmer has already gotten the lead out.

      I don’t know much about Becker County other than they use the SMV triangle so would rule out Swartzentruber Amish: http://www.twincities.com/localnews/ci_26538987/becker-county-pickup-rear-ends-amish-buggy

      This article tells you more about the community, but you need a subscription to read in full (I did not). http://www.dl-online.com/content/amish-becker-county

      Original families came from Michigan and Wisconsin in 2007, and had grown to 2 districts as of 2013, which suggests you may be right that they are growing fairly rapidly.

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        Comment on Thank you (February 26th, 2015 at 00:43)

        Thank you

        Thank you Erik, for the information!

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