17 responses to 5 Tips When Planning an Amish Wedding
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    Mark — Holmes Co.
    Comment on 5 Tips When Planning an Amish Wedding (April 1st, 2017 at 08:59)

    Well, if no one else is going to comment, I will. :)

    Weddings vary a lot from community to community and group to group. The Lancaster type weddings are very different from Holmes Co., starting with the season. While most PA weddings are in the fall or winter, ours lean more towards spring, early summer, and early fall.

    #1 — PA weddings ceremonies & receptions are at the bride’s home. Here the service will be at a neighbor’s home & the reception at the bride’s home. Most receptions (if not all) are held in a “shop” or multi-purpose building. Since it’s generally a one story building to begin with, extra supports are not needed.

    #2 — It seems as though non-Amish guests are more common in our weddings than in PA. There may be enough to fill a table or two, but there is no effort made to put them “out of the way.” Since non-Amish relatives are usually seated with the Amish relatives, there may be non-Amish people mixed in with the Amish.

    #3 & #4 — since relatives & close friends are invited as “help” and it’s an honor to help at a wedding, there are all kinds of assigned positions ranging from cooks, servers, babysitters, dishwashers, water boys & girls, coffee makers & servers, gift receivers, etc. so the babysitting position often falls on girls old enough to be responsibly but not old enough to be with the youth. Water servers are usually boys & girls around 12-15 years old.

    #5 — the meal varies, too. Celery is traditional in PA weddings but not served here. Here the same menu serves the noon meal & supper. Having helped at both PA & local weddings, I can say the OH ones are more “streamlined” and do not take quite as much elaborate preparation, but both are delicious! Another major difference is in PA married men also help prepare & serve the food while in OH the preparations is mostly done by women, though men & boys help with the serving. I’m not sure if this means PA men are more helpful or that OH women have a lower opinion of their husband’s cooking skills or what. :)

    • Comparing Ohio and Pennsylvania Amish Weddings

      Mark thanks for jumping in with the extra details and the Holmes County Old Order wedding picture :)

      On #2, I got a comment from a reader surprised about it, I think she found it offensive. And I can see by the way it is worded, it probably sounds like they are trying to keep the English “out of the way”.

      I don’t think that’s the case though, it’s probably just to have them with other people that they can comfortably speak with since some or many won’t know PA Dutch. At least any time I’ve been to church events in Lancaster County, I’ve always been made to feel welcome and never tucked away somewhere… Maybe I shouldn’t press my luck though! 😀

      On #5, you can only see 3 or 4 Celery-related items in the photo I posted above, but there were actually 6 in that chart. So, if you are going to a Lancaster wedding and like celery, get excited.

      I like the question you raised about men helping out to different degrees in Ohio and PA. Not a research topic I’m prepared to explore, but interesting nonetheless 😉

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        Mark — Holmes Co.
        Comment on 5 Tips When Planning an Amish Wedding (April 3rd, 2017 at 07:37)

        Erik, I can see how #2 could have been offensive! As soon as I read it, I thought, “Well, that’s kind of a rude way to put it!” How would I feel if I was reading a Mennonite or _____ fill in your blank___ wedding planning book and it suggested seating the Amish in the basement so we are out of the way?

        I’m trusting it was not meant quite like that, but still. And good point on the language. If I were attending a wedding where everyone spoke a different language that I didn’t, I’d want to be seated with folks I could visit with.

        Talking about it at home, though, we could remember being at different weddings in PA where the non-Amish guests were seated together but NOT in the basement or out of the way place.

        I like celery, but was VERY surprised upon my first taste of creamed celery at a PA Amish wedding — it was VERY sweet, more like a dessert. Must be an acquired taste…

        And the topic of men helping has been frequently discussed, ha ha, but you are right, not a topic for research. (Or I should say “not yet.” I can imagine a sociologist making a note on that for a research paper, ha!)

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    Donald Curtis
    Comment on Belle Center, Ohio weddings (April 1st, 2017 at 12:57)

    Belle Center, Ohio weddings

    I asked my son, Mark, who is a part of the Belle Center, Ohio community. I read him Holmes County, Ohio Mark’s comments and he concurred. He did comment that at Belle Center, only Amish may have parts in the weddings. Beachy Amish and Mennonite relatives may not have a part as far as table waiters, hostlers, etc. Most Holmes County weddings that Mark knows about usually don’t have an evening meal. At Belle Center, an evenings meal is served and all of the community’s young folks are invited. The boys sit across the table from the girls. Usually at the evening meal hot sandwiches, chicken and noodles, and a relish plate are served. Any Amish excommunicated are seated and served at the tables with the English guests.

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    Mark — Holmes Co.
    Comment on 5 Tips When Planning an Amish Wedding (April 1st, 2017 at 13:35)

    Hi Donald,
    You Mark is New Order and I am Old Order. :) His comments sound like he is describing Holmes Co. New Order weddings, which are somewhat different from ours. (As they don’t have an evening meal, where we do.) It’s interesting to attend weddings in various different settings and see how they might be the same or different.

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    Emily
    Comment on Very interesting (April 1st, 2017 at 19:52)

    Very interesting

    I thought this was a great post. Mark, I was happy to read your comment also. One of my favorite books growing up was Stephen Scott’s “An Amish Wedding”; I loved hearing about all the details of different special occasions in Old Order communities, as well as how things differed by community. It would be interesting to read an updated version of that book if one is ever written–I’d sure volunteer to do the research!

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      Mark — Holmes Co.
      Comment on 5 Tips When Planning an Amish Wedding (April 3rd, 2017 at 06:20)

      Emily, I’m not sure that book is still in print! Someone should re-print it with an update. How about it? :)

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        Comment on 5 Tips When Planning an Amish Wedding (April 3rd, 2017 at 06:43)

        Emily I’ve also really enjoyed Steve’s little books on many Amish topics – buggies, Plain clothing, etc. Since most of them were published 15-20+ years ago, it’s true they would be ripe for updates. Unfortunately he’s not around anymore to do it, but maybe someone will.

        I see one of them has actually gotten a new release last year, with at least a new cover (and intro?), but haven’t checked out if the content has actually been updated:

        https://www.amazon.com/Living-Without-Electricity-Lessons-Amish-ebook/dp/B01HDVCW40/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1491219566&sr=1-2&keywords=stephen+scott+amish

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        Emily
        Comment on New editions (April 3rd, 2017 at 17:08)

        New editions

        Mark (and all),

        Maybe we Amish America readers should pool our knowledge on new editions! I’d be willing to collect information and do the writing. Given all our various Plain connections, it would be harder to figure out what to omit than what to leave in. :)

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    Urs
    Comment on 5 Tips When Planning an Amish Wedding (April 2nd, 2017 at 19:10)

    The correct translation for Das Hochzeit Buechlein into english is The Wedding Booklet.

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